Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue actually wrote the marital handbook.
The long-married couple’s book, What Makes a Marriage Last: Insider Stories, contains personal facts about their marriage. Forty Well-Known Couples Share Their Secrets with Us.
The most fascinating revelation made by Marlo is that, even though she and Phil have been married for over 40 years, she never really wanted to get married.
The famous person expressed in the book her previously negative opinion of the institution, saying that marriage is like a vacuum cleaner that sucks away all of your ambition and vitality when you stick it to your ear.
Thomas frequently shares her opinions, likening marriage to having to placate a prisoner. That is, until she met Donahue.
Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas met following the dissolution of their first marriage, and they have remained lifelong friends ever since.
The Phil Donahue Show, which was eventually renamed as simply “Donahue,” was the vehicle through which Phil Donahue first gained popular recognition. For the first time, audience members participated in the program, which ran for 29 years. One of the visitors on his show who radically changed his life’s trajectory was Marlo Thomas.
The book claims that the two met in 1977 in Chicago, when Phil was bringing four children with him. His fifth child, a daughter, lived somewhere else with her mother and ex-wife.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before being married in 1980 in front of a small wedding party of thirty-five guests.
Not surprise, Marlo’s friends and family were taken aback by the actress’s sudden change of heart. A hilarious story of Marlo’s bridal shower, where visitors hung notes from the soon-to-be bride that disclosed her past views on marriage, is featured in the couple’s book.
The book claims that Marlo’s mother was the most shocked of all, asking Donahue, “How did you get her to do this?” throughout the nuptials of the pair.
Reportedly, among other emotions, even total strangers voiced shock at the well-known social activist’s decision to get married. While Phil was in the lavatory, a passenger on the airplane the couple took to Greece for their honeymoon expressed displeasure to Marlo, presumably disappointed that she had given up her old independent streak.
In the book, Thomas is honest enough to acknowledge that something was unclear when they spoke. After all her life condemning marriage, was she suddenly a hypocrite for getting married? Had she let those down who held her in high regard as the embodiment of self-reliance?
Even though Donahue and Thomas discuss the usual ups and downs of their long marriage in the book, they manage to make their marriage work to this day. They describe these problems as teaching moments that deepened their relationship.
The couple had been apart from the beginning of their marriage, with Phil traveling to Chicago to tape his show and Marlo traveling to pursue her acting career.
Thomas had a greater understanding of how different individuals define marriage when his aunt said that the couple’s union was void because they weren’t living together exclusively. In spite of their separation, Thomas and Donahue were able to keep their marriage together. Significantly, Marlo’s marriage resulted in her having children.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Thomas reflected on her experience helping Phil raise his kids, stating she went into it knowing that they already had a traditional mother and that would not be her role.
Rather, Marlo claims that she began to treat Phil’s children more like friends in an effort to mimic the parenting style of her own mother. She continues by saying that she feels more connected to them today than she did at the start of their marriage.
Donahue points out that Thomas really did strive to understand the lads in the book and spent as much time as she could getting to know his sons.
Phil and Marlo believe that their long marriage is a result of her strong bond with his kids and their mutual faith in each other. “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back,” says Marlo in clarification.
Despite being married for more than 40 years, they still have more memories to make.
Phil goes on to argue that a marriage has to be desired by both parties in order for it to last. Marlo says she would never want to be anything other than married to her lover, echoing his sentiments. She claims that Donahue has assisted her “in every manner possible.”
When two people truly commit to one another, marriage is an incredibly lovely union that is made much more beautiful.
These two have a lot to teach and inspire us all. As satisfying as their relationship is, we should all strive to be in one!
On Thanksgiving Eve, I Took in an Abandoned Child Only to Uncover My Boyfriend’s True Intentions — Story of the Day
On Thanksgiving Eve, a single moment unraveled everything I thought I knew about love, family, and the future I’d planned. One unexpected encounter forced me to face a choice I never saw coming.
My cart was brimming with everything needed for the perfect Thanksgiving Eve: turkey, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, and even a bouquet of fresh flowers for the centerpiece. It was a ritual I loved, a chance to create something warm and special, even if Paul and I hadn’t fully agreed on what “special” meant for our future.
Passing the baby aisle, I couldn’t help but slow down. Rows of soft onesies and tiny shoes drew my gaze. I imagined the life I longed for—children laughing, little hands helping set the table. Paul hadn’t warmed to the idea yet, but I told myself he would someday.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
“I need to grab some wine,” Paul said suddenly, pulling me from my thoughts. “Why don’t you finish up here? I’ll meet you at the car.”
“Okay. Don’t be long.”
He leaned in, kissed my cheek lightly, and walked away toward the liquor section. Before I could reach for the whipped cream on my list, a frantic voice startled me.
“Excuse me! Please, can you hold her for just a minute?”
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I turned to see a woman, her face pale and her eyes darting around. Without waiting for my answer, she placed a small child in my arms.
“I’ll be right back!” she said hurriedly and disappeared into the aisles.
The little girl was so light in my arms, clutching a well-worn stuffed rabbit and staring up at me. Her light curls framed her face, giving her an angelic, fragile look.
“Uh… hi there,” I said, crouching down to her level and carefully setting her on her feet. “What’s your name?”
“Ella,” she whispered, holding her rabbit closer.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
“That’s a beautiful name.
I glanced around, hoping to catch sight of her mother, but the aisle was empty. Minutes ticked by, turning into ten. Unease settled deep in my stomach.
I couldn’t wait any longer, so I walked with Ella to the security desk to seek help to locate her mother. The staff quickly made an announcement over the intercom, but no one came forward. Ella pressed herself against my side.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
“Mommy said I’d spend the holidays with a new mommy,” she whispered.
The words hit me like a blow. My throat tightened as I fought back the surge of emotion.
“Lisa?” Paul approached, holding a bottle of wine in one hand and frowning as he took in the scene.
“What’s going on?” he asked, glancing between Ella and me.
I explained quickly, my words tumbling out.
“We need to take her to the police,” Paul said firmly. “They’ll know what to do.”
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
I hesitated, looking down at Ella. Her tiny hand was still gripping mine like I was the only thing anchoring her to safety.
“Paul, I…”
“This isn’t something you can solve, Lisa,” he interrupted. “It’s not safe to keep her with us.”
I nodded, feeling a heavy weight settle in my chest as we walked to the car. Ella climbed into the backseat. She didn’t cry or fuss, she just stared quietly out the window as the streetlights flickered past.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
***
Paul drove in silence. I glanced at Ella. Her small figure looked so vulnerable huddled in the back seat. With every passing mile, the pull to protect her only grew stronger.
“Is that turkey in the bag?” Ella’s small voice broke the silence.
“Yes,” I said, turning slightly to meet her gaze. “It’s for Thanksgiving dinner.”
“What’s Thanksgiving?” she asked, tilting her head as though trying to puzzle it out.
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“It’s a holiday where we celebrate everything we’re thankful for,” I explained. “We gather with family, share a big meal, and spend time together.”
She frowned slightly. “I’ve never had a Thanksgiving. Is turkey good?”
The simplicity of her question hit me harder than I expected.
“Turkey’s delicious. And cranberry sauce, too. Have you ever tried it?”
Ella shook her head, clutching the rabbit closer. “No. Mommy says holidays are for other people.”
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
My heart ached for her. As the police station came into view, I felt my pulse quicken.
“Paul, pull over,” I said suddenly, pointing to a gas station on the right.
“What?” He glanced at me, his brows knitting together. “We’re almost there, Lisa. Let’s just get this done.”
“Please, Paul. I need a moment to think.”
With a huff of frustration, he turned into the gas station and parked by the pumps. I unbuckled my seatbelt and stepped out into the crisp November air.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
Paul followed. “What are you doing?”
“I’m not sure we should take her to the station yet. She’s just a child, Paul. She’s never had a Thanksgiving dinner. She’s never even tasted turkey.”
“And how is that our problem?” he shot back, gesturing toward the car. “Lisa, this isn’t our responsibility.”
“Maybe not. But doesn’t she deserve one happy evening? One night where she feels safe and loved?”
“Are you serious right now? You want to bring a stranger’s kid into our home? Do you even hear yourself?”
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I nodded. At that moment, Paul strode to the car, opened the back door, and motioned for Ella to get out.
“Paul, wait…” I started, panic rising in my chest.
“Good luck, Lisa,” he said coldly, climbing back into the driver’s seat.
Without another glance, he pulled away, leaving Ella and me standing at the gas station.
“It’s okay,” Ella whispered, looking up at me with a brave smile.
Her words both broke and steadied me. I knew I couldn’t turn back.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
***
Ella and I returned to the store. As we wandered through the aisles, I let her pick out a few extra decorations—paper turkeys, bright orange streamers, and even a tiny plush turkey she hugged tightly as if it were a long-lost friend.
“Can we get these too?” she asked, pointing to a pack of colorful paper napkins with cartoon pilgrims on them.
“Of course,” I said, smiling. “Anything else?”
She tilted her head thoughtfully, then grabbed a bag of marshmallows. “These.”
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
I couldn’t go back to Paul’s place, but thankfully, I had my small apartment. It wasn’t festive or particularly grand, but it was mine. So, arriving at my apartment, we began the transformation.
Ella’s enthusiasm was contagious as she helped unpack the bags. Later, she insisted on stirring the cranberry sauce, her small hands gripping the wooden spoon tightly as she stood on a step stool.
“Is this okay?” she asked, looking up at me.
“It’s perfect,” I assured her. “You’re a natural.”
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The apartment began to glow from the warmth Ella brought into the space. When the turkey was finally ready, I carried it to the table, and Ella gasped as if I had presented her with a treasure.
“It’s so big,” she whispered, her eyes as round as the plates I’d set out.
“Let’s eat!” I said, pulling out a chair for her.
She hesitated, standing by her seat. “This is like a real Thanksgiving, right?”
“It is. The realest one I’ve ever had.”
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
We sat together, and Ella’s laughter rang out as she tried cranberry sauce for the first time, her face scrunching up before she declared it “weird but good.”
Ella sat on the floor, cradling her plush turkey and staring at the glowing candles.
“Tomorrow, it’ll be over. I know I can’t stay.”
I knelt beside her, pulling her into my arms. “Ella, I wish you could. But tonight is ours, okay? No one can take this away.”
She nodded against my shoulder. “Thank you for today. It was the best day ever.”
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
Meanwhile, a sharp knock at the door shattered the moment. I opened the door to find two representatives from Child Protective Services standing there. Behind them, Paul stood silently.
The CPS worker knelt at Ella’s level. “Hi, sweetie. We’re here to take you somewhere safe.”
Ella’s grip on my arm tightened. “Do I have to go?”
“They’ll take good care of you. I promise.”
Her small hand slipped from mine as they gently led her away. Tears streamed down her cheeks, and she kept looking back at me, her turkey clutched tightly to her chest.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
***
As the door closed behind the CPS workers, I stood frozen, the emptiness of the apartment settling over me. Ella’s laughter still echoed faintly in my ears, but the warmth of the evening had vanished. I barely registered Paul’s footsteps as he walked up behind me.
“Well,” he said casually, his tone almost cheerful. “Let’s head to my place. We can still have that Thanksgiving dinner we planned.”
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I turned to him slowly. “Paul… are you serious?”
My voice wavered, caught somewhere between disbelief and anger. He frowned slightly as if he couldn’t quite grasp what I was upset about.
“What? I know tonight’s been… different, but we can still salvage it. I’ve got everything ready back home.”
“Paul,” I said, my words sharp, “how can you even think about that right now?”
“Is this about earlier? Look, I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have left you two like that. I… I overreacted.”
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I stared at him. “You weren’t thinking clearly? Paul, a little girl needed one evening of love, of feeling like someone cared about her!”
He stepped closer, his hands raised in a gesture of appeasement.
“I get it. And I’m sorry. But Lisa, you can’t let this ruin everything. We’re good together as we are. Why complicate things with kids?”
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
“Paul, this isn’t just about Ella. I’m 36. It’s about the family I’ve dreamed of.”
“Lisa, I love you. Isn’t that enough?”
“Not really. Not in the way I need us to be.”
“You’re serious, aren’t you?”
“Yes. I am.”
“I guess this is it, then,” Paul muttered, heading for the door.
I didn’t stop him. The life I had imagined with him was nothing more than an illusion.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
***
That night, sleep was impossible. I lay awake, my mind replaying every moment with Ella. By morning, I drove to CPS and explained my intentions. The caseworker warned me of the challenges.
“These processes take time. It won’t be easy.”
“I’ll wait,” I said without hesitation. “However long it takes.”
Weeks passed. Finally, on Christmas Eve, the call came. My approval had been finalized. Ella was coming home.
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When I opened the door to see her standing there, her small face breaking into a smile, the weight of the past months disappeared. She ran into my arms, hugging me tightly.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
“Welcome home, Ella.”
That night, we decorated a Christmas tree together, stringing lights and hanging ornaments. Ella became my miracle, the heart of every holiday to come, and the family I had dreamed of for so long.
For illustration purposes only | Source: Midjourney
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If you enjoyed this story, read this one: I thought adopting a child would complete our family, but nothing prepared me for the challenges that followed. Just when everything seemed to fall apart, an unexpected turn changed our lives forever.
This piece is inspired by stories from the everyday lives of our readers and written by a professional writer. Any resemblance to actual names or locations is purely coincidental. All images are for illustration purposes only. Share your story with us; maybe it will change someone’s life.
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