I take it that everyone of us must navigate our own lives and take responsibility for our decisions? However, it is in our nature as humans to want to help friends who are actually in need. However, what would you do if your friend—the one you always stand by—started confiding in you about all of their issues, repeatedly, and with no sign of stopping? This Reddit member is exactly in that predicament. She wondered if she was managing the matter with her buddy correctly, so she looked to the large internet community for advice.
I(32F) am a single mother of two kids (6M and 5m F). I am a single mother by choice (my kids are donor conceived).
I am lucky enough to have a good job (French teacher in a private school), and a paid off house (parents’ life insurance and inheritance).
Before I had either of my kids, I made sure to have a year’s living expenses saved, then I would take a sabbatical to recover from birth, as well as bond with my kids. While on sabbatical, I still tutor some kids for some extra income.
My friend (34F), just had a baby 2 months ago. She is the breadwinner in her household, and her husband has been unemployed since he was laid off during COVID.
It was great to be pregnant at the same time, as well as having a friend with a newborn. But it has turned sour.
She has been saying how jealous she is of me being able to take off a whole year from work, how she would have loved to not worry about losing their home, how she doesn’t even have a couple hundred dollars in her savings account, let alone a whole year’s worth of living expenses….
I usually ignore it, or brush it off, because I kind of can understand the stress she is under.
Well, starting about 10 days ago, she started hinting at not being able to afford daycare, and any mention of her husband taking care of their kid is brushed off. Then she started remarking on how much free time I must have, which I deflected by saying -truthfully- that being a single mom to a baby and a small kid left me no free time actually.
Then last night she came out with it, and asked if I could “do her a favor” and watch her kid while she’s at work. I was firm, but polite, when I said that I couldn’t, that I am not capable of watching two kids under 6 months.
She started almost begging me, saying she can’t afford daycare, and if she is not back at work, she will lose her job, and they will end up homeless. I again brought up her husband, and she said that he was not good with kids, and isn’t capable of taking care of her kid.
I kept saying no, she kept pushing, until it escalated to her calling me heartless, and me telling her that it’s not my problem she chose to have a kid with a useless man.
Now she blocked me, I am feeling very guilty about what I said, and feeling like an AH.
Am I Wrong for Teaching My Daughter-in-Law a Lesson after She Made My Wife Pay for a Cleaning Service?
Am I Wrong for Teaching My Daughter-in-Law a Lesson after She Made My Wife Pay for a Cleaning Service?
After my daughter-in-law humiliated my wife by making her pay for a cleaning service after a week of babysitting, I knew I had to teach her a lesson about gratitude. When the opportunity arose, I devised a plan to show her exactly what my wife had endured, turning the tables in an unforgettable way.
Hi, I’m Jacob, and I have a story to share about my daughter-in-law (DIL). My wife and I have always been close to our son and his family. We love spending time with our grandkids and often help out when needed.
Elderly couple and their grandkids | Source: Pexels
Our relationship with our son and his family has always been strong. We see them often, share meals, and celebrate holidays together. We feel lucky to be involved in our grandkids’ lives, watching them grow and supporting them whenever we can.
As grandparents, we take pride in being there for our family. Whether it’s picking up the kids from school, babysitting on short notice, or just offering advice, we’re always ready to help. We know how hard it can be to juggle work and family, so we do what we can to lighten the load.
Happy grandparents | Source: Pexels
A few weeks ago, our son and DIL had to go on a business trip. They asked my wife to babysit for a week. She loves spending time with the grandkids, so she agreed without hesitation. She packed her bags and moved into their house for the week.
While she was there, she took care of everything. She cooked meals, helped with homework, and made sure the house was tidy. The kids had a great time with their grandma, and she even did extra chores to help out. When she returned home, I was eager to hear all about their week together.
Sad elderly woman | Source: Pexels
But something was clearly wrong. Her eyes were red and puffy, and she looked like she had been crying. I asked her what happened, but at first, she didn’t want to tell me.
“Honey, what’s wrong?” I asked gently. She shook her head, avoiding my eyes.
“It’s nothing,” she said, her voice trembling.
I wasn’t convinced. “Please, tell me. What happened?”
Concerned elderly man | Source: Pexels
After some coaxing, she finally opened up. “Right before our son and DIL returned, she called me. She said I had to pay for a professional cleaning service.”
I was stunned. “What? Why?”
“She claimed the house was a mess and it was unacceptable,” she said, her voice breaking. “But I took care of the kids, cleaned up after them, and even did some extra chores.”
“And that wasn’t enough for her?” I asked, feeling my anger rising.
Upset woman | Source: Pexels
“She said it wasn’t,” my wife replied, tears streaming down her face. “I felt humiliated, Jacob. I didn’t want to argue and risk damaging our relationship with them, so I paid the cleaning bill. I thought I was helping, but she made me feel like I failed.”
Hearing this made me furious. “You did them a huge favor, and this is how they repay you?” I said, my voice shaking with anger. “This is unacceptable. You shouldn’t have had to go through that.”
Elderly man in a sweater | Source: Pexels
She nodded, looking defeated. “I just didn’t want to cause any trouble.”
“I understand,” I said, trying to stay calm. “But this disrespect needs to be addressed. I need to teach our DIL a lesson about gratitude and respect.”
And so, I started planning how to make sure this would never happen again.
Elderly man with a tablet | Source: Pexels
I spent a few days thinking about it and came up with a plan. I decided to give my DIL a taste of her own medicine. I called my son and DIL and offered to babysit the kids for a weekend. They were thrilled and quickly accepted my offer. They needed the break and trusted me completely.
The plan was simple. I would document the state of the house when I arrived, take care of the kids for the weekend, clean the house thoroughly, and then present them with a bill for a professional cleaning service. This way, they would understand what my wife went through.
Messy bedroom | Source: Pexels
I arrived at my son and DIL’s house on Friday evening. As soon as I walked in, I took pictures of every room, documenting the cleanliness and order. The house was already in good shape, but I wanted to make sure I had proof of how it looked when I arrived.
I spent the weekend with my grandkids, having a wonderful time. We played games, read stories, and enjoyed each other’s company. I made sure to clean up after ourselves, keeping the house tidy throughout our time together.
Grandfather and his granddaughter | Source: Pexels
Before my son and DIL returned on Sunday evening, I went into action. I cleaned the house from top to bottom, making it look spotless. I vacuumed, dusted, scrubbed, and polished every surface. By the time I was done, the house was immaculate.
When my son and DIL walked in, they were pleased to see how clean and organized everything was. I took a deep breath and decided it was time.
Neat room | Source: Pexels
“Hey, can we talk for a minute?” I asked. My son and DIL exchanged curious looks but nodded. I showed them the pictures I had taken when I arrived.
“This is how the house looked when I got here on Friday,” I said, scrolling through the images on my phone. “And this is how it looks now.”
They both looked puzzled.
“Dad, what’s going on?” my son asked.
Couple arguing | Source: Pexels
I took out the bill I had prepared. “I’m handing you a bill for a professional cleaning service,” I said, handing it to my DIL. Her face turned red with confusion and anger.
“Why would we need to pay this?” she snapped.
I stayed calm. “This is what your mother had to go through after she babysat for you. She did you a favor, took care of your kids, and you humiliated her by making her pay for a cleaning service. I thought it was only fair that you experience the same thing.”
Couple argues | Source: Pexels
My son’s eyes widened, and he turned to his wife. “Is this true?” he asked her.
She stammered, “I… I thought the house wasn’t clean enough. I didn’t mean to upset her.”
My son sighed, clearly disappointed. “You should have appreciated what Mom did for us. She didn’t deserve that.”
Upset concerned old man | Source: Pexels
Turning back to me, he said, “Dad, I’m so sorry. We’ll reimburse Mom immediately. This will never happen again.”
My DIL looked down, embarrassed. “I’m sorry, too. I didn’t realize how much I hurt her.”
I nodded, feeling some of the tension ease. “I hope this experience helps you understand the importance of gratitude and respect.”
Happy elderly couple | Source: Pexels
Since then, things have been a bit tense, but I think my DIL got the message. My wife and I continue to help out with the grandkids, but now there’s a newfound respect for the efforts we put in.
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